Real world examples of inviting loyalty.
New examples are added at the bottom of each section.
Keep these in mind for all of your loyalty invitations.
Competence
Integrity
Consistency
Connection
“Developing trust: Understand the 4 elements first”
Laurie K.Cure
Chief Learning Officer
June 25, 2021
Business
Chris Mara founded analog recording studio Welcome to 1979 to help “modern musicians accurately re-create classic sounds.”
Bigger studios who don’t see Mara’s studio as competition send him referrals. Mara refers potential customers to studios closer to where they lived.
“In Mara’s estimation, building a competitive network is 80 percent altruism and 20 percent business. ‘All I really want to do is help people,’ he says.”
Mara gets referrals from those other studios.
“Harmonious collaborations”
Erika Napoletano
Entrepreneur Magazine
August 2012: page 26.
Cliques
Advice for children about school cliques can be adapted for adults and workplace cliques
“Most children desperately want to be accepted. If a different haircut or style of pants is affordable and will make them feel less excluded, there’s no reason to forbid it. In fact, having the right ‘uniform’ can give a child leverage to do something really important, such as sticking up for someone who’s being picked on. This doesn’t mean third-grader has to face down a clique leader (touch for even the bravest). But he might go beyond just standing by—and invite a less popular child to sit at his lunch table, for instance, or have a playdate after school.”
Children who stand up for clique outsiders invite loyalty. Since more children are outside the clique than inside the clique, the loyalty benefits from outsiders are greater than the loyalty benefits from insiders. You cannot tell what someone could do for your life just by looking at them.
“Coping with Cliques”
Laurel Graeber
Parents Magazine
October 2002: Pages 245-246.
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AIDS patients will probably never be considered popular. As a single woman, Diana Spencer could do little to improve life for people with AIDS. Once she joined the British Royal Family clique and followed those rules, however, Princess Diana was able to improve life for people with AIDS. She invited loyalty from around the world.
“On 1 July 2021, it would’ve been Princess Diana’s 60th birthday. In honour of the occasion, I believe it’s important to look back at the momentous impact she had on public perceptions of HIV and celebrate her legacy. Because, with every gloveless handshake and every hug, she helped to challenge the hysteria and fear which was rife at the time. I truly believe we wouldn’t be where we are today without her.”
Ian Green, Chief Executive
Together We Can
Government
Former U.S. Secretary of Defense Robert Gates decided to deal head on with tensions between the Defense Department and the State Department. He invited Secretary of State Hillary Clinton to lunch.
“I just told her, based on my experience, that how well the administration worked would depend a lot on how well she and I got along together,” Gates recalls. “If we got along, the message would go to the entire bureaucracy—not just our own bureaucracies but the rest of government as well. She totally understood.”
Gates also argued for the State Department to get a bigger budget.
Gates and Clinton worked out their differences during as many private weekly sessions as they could schedule.
“Robert Gates Retires From Pentagon, Warns America”
John Barry
Newsweek
June 19, 2011
Job Interviews
Tough Interview ?s: Don’t Torpedo Your Job Chances with Your Answer to “Why Did You Leave Your Last Job?”
Lynne Curry
Workplace Coach Blog
February 20, 2024
Life Difficulties
Inviting loyalty from the people around you brings loyalty to you when your life crashes.
SexyCoolLounge Podcast With Host Jimmy IV
Scroll down to the bottom of the web page to the episodes list
Episode 112
The Sky Is Not The Limit, with Special Host ~ Jess Marie
January 2, 2024
11:43 to 14:05
Nelson Mandela
“(Nelson) Mandela did form a friendship with a prison guard on Robben Island, but, according to his authorised biography, that was a man called Christo Brand. Brand came to Robben Island in 1978 as an unquestioningly pro-apartheid 18-year-old white prison guard. His experiences with the dignified Mandela brought him to change his views about the man, about racial oppression and his country. The Observer tracked down Brand to his Cape Town home.
‘When I came to the prison, Nelson Mandela was already 60. He was down-to-earth and courteous. He treated me with respect and my respect for him grew. After a while, even though he was a prisoner, a friendship grew. It was a friendship behind bars,’ said Brand, now 47, of the relationship that transformed his life.
Brand came to do ‘favours’ for Mandela, smuggling him the bread and hair pomade that he liked and bringing him messages. He broke the rules to allow Mandela to hold his infant grandson.
‘Mandela was worried that I would get caught and be punished,’ said Brand. ‘He wrote to my wife telling her that I must continue my studies. Even as a prisoner he was encouraging a warder to study.’
“The guard who really was Mandela’s friend”
Andrew Meldrum
The Guardian
May 19, 2007
Political Crises
Spanish diplomat Sanz Briz invited loyalty from a German provincial commander (Gauleiter) during World War II by giving the Gauleiter loyalty. Briz wanted help getting Jews of Spanish origin to Spain. He did what other diplomats had not done: listened to the Gauleiter’s concerns about Hungarians in Soviet occupied areas.
“I sent [the commander] a polite letter, accompanied by a substantial sum of money, asking that it be used to help the refugees in areas occupied by the Soviet Union.”
The Gauleiter directed his troops “to respect all buildings under Spanish sovereignty.”
Briz accepted the Gauleiter’s condition that Francisco Franco’s government in Spain pay for relocating Jews of Spanish origin.
Briz went from relocating the 200 Jews he originally asked for to relocating an unlimited number of families.
Anuschka Seufert
From Cambio16 news magazine of Madrid
“Other ‘Schindlers’ Revealed”
World Press Review Magazine
November 1994: pages 44-46
Workplace Cooperation
Barbara Stanwyck was known as “perhaps the kindest person in Hollywood.” She showed interest in everyone, including “the lowest paid stagehand.”
“She did know everybody by name. She made it her business to do that. Because when you do that —
she knew very well — they take extra care of you when you acknowledge the fact that they are there
and you appreciate them.”
Robert Culp
“She knew their families. At the end of the day, she said goodnight to them, everyone. Well, they just
loved her. They’d do anything for her.”
Pat Crowley
Pioneers of Television
Westerns
2011
Workplace Violence
People become angry enough to become violent because of what they believe about circumstances.
“According to (Mike) Staver, at least one of three primary triggers is in place when a person grow angry:
The person feels the circumstances are unfair.
The person feels the circumstances are out of his or her control.
The person feels the circumstances are personal.”
The strength of the belief influences the seriousness of the violence.
“The more intensely the person feels these factors, the worse the violence can get,”
Stover said. “Naturally, if you see these triggers in a coworker or employee,
you should be very concerned.”
21 Ways To Defuse Anger And Calm People Down
Michael Staver
“What Are The Signs Of Workplace Violence?”
Susan Adams
Forbes Magazine
May 8, 2012
“Workplace Violence Triggers, Warning Signs and Solutions”
Laura Walter
EHSToday
March 9, 2012
© Paula M. Kramer, 2023
All rights reserved.
Updated June 8, 2024.